" Its not what you leave behind, its what you gain in the days ahead"
Thats the first thing you see when you enter Pulau Tekong.
For most thats bull.
Seriously.
I've seen people go "fuck la!" whenever thay see that.
Many times.
But i'm gonna go out and say that i truly believe in that,
I do.
Every time i walk down that path i smile at that billboard poster.
Crazy?
Patriotic crap?
maybe.
But when you think about it, like or dislike can any singaporean forget their army days?
Can you honestly go "i don't want to talk about it" is someone asks you about the army.
Good or bad everyone who's ORDed always starts reminiscing about their NS days with a grin only to end with a "it was ok lah!" and a smile. Thats the beauty of conscription in a democratic state. Everyone gets used to it.
No one i know will ever choose to forget about their days in the Army.
Thats what you gain.
Thats what its all about.
I've been in the army for slightly more than 3 months now.
All the companies that enlisted with mine in December have POPed.
All gone.
So you will have no idea when i say its kinda lonely on that island.
I still have 2 more months.
70 days
This is no time to be losing our spirits guys.
Thats what all the above is for,
Some of my bros back in camp were emo-ing last week.
Can't blame them,
Heck i feel like crap too.
I just don't show it up front.
Ha.
Saras called me today.
Wanted to catch a movie.
I'm booking in at 2200hrs tonight so i figured i'd drop by.
She was with a bunch of kids from the school she's relief teaching in.
Thats Saras.
Now you guys know why i'm always surrounded by kids.
Haha.
The thing about kids is that you can't help envying how untouched they are.
There wasn't a moment of peace.
hahah.
Took my mind of the dread of booking in today.
When they were all gone and it was just Saras, Prateepan and me things cosied up a little.
She was telling me about her course applications and the kid kept rattling on about PSPs and stuff.
Therapeutic actually.
Haha.
But something odd happened today.
When Saras and Prateepan left my heart sank a little.
As I saw the two of them walking away smiling i just felt that it wasn't fair that everyone's living their dream and basking the warmth of life while i have to go back to camp and clean my rifle.
For a minute i missed the times i was walking and smiling with them.
What if by the time i get out of NS nothing's the same?
I guess that the thing about NS that freaks us guys.
Everything changes except us.
We do change...in our own ways...but its still not the same.
I told Isma before i enlisted that i'll be back soon.
can't wait for that.
soon.
For now its just my rifle and my buddy and me.
Note: Thanks for reading Yusmar. I mean it when i say i miss you and the god ol' days haha.
LOCCsays: 189days
